Overheard in various classes

* Then they told me to take my pants off and I did in front of everybody and they put the handcuffs on and arrested me.

* He won't be here for awhile. What happened? He took a car and got arrested.

* I'm going to call the cops! My dad hit me in the head with a hammer. (This one backed down quick when I pointed out I would need to report this)

* I was put on earth to help people.