The habits/qualities that you find the most irritable in other people are the things you don't like about yourself.
I find Funsucker to be a caricature of myself.
Not exactly, but I see in her the things - exaggerated - that I have worked hard to eliminate.
Temper. She pitches a fit when she doesn't get her way and runs and tells the administration to get you in trouble. I have worked hard to control the temper I know I have. The fact that I am still married to the person I married decades ago says he is either really patient (not) or I am somewhat successful.
Listening. She doesn't listen to what anyone says. She is so busy thinking about her reply, that she doesn't hear your answer. I take notes during most meetings just to keep my mind from wandering.
Control. Oh, this is a biggie. She wants it her way. I want it right, which I suppose is my way. I watch her do things almost right. In the scheme of things, it will not matter. But it grates. Go back to the not listening and temper, and this is something I will have to back off on to get through this year. A friend said, she wants to be the general ed teacher - let her teach. Do the other things in the time she is trying to explain concepts. That is so hard for me to do. I want to butt in and FIX it.
I watched her teach something in 2 distinct steps that I do in one. With the other teachers, we would have laughed, explained you get the same answer but here is another way to do it. With her, I let it be. I think she is creating more work for everyone, but she isn't flexible.
Pride. We both have it. I pride myself in being able to explain things to people. She wants it known that she has equal or better qualifications to teach this. Then why does she refuse to work any of the worksheets and share HER answers on the board ("I don't do that"). Really.
Her skill, she tells me, is editing. My skill (I don't say) is filtering through a lot of things and finding a solution. My skill (I don't say) is in explaining in as many different ways as is necessary so that the person finally understands it. My skill (I don't say) is in creating.
I have always known I was intelligent. I don't think I really understood until I took the gifted certification. It wasn't the first unit or even the second, but somewhere in reading the characteristics of the gifted versus high achieving versus average - I got it. And I could SEE the difference and understand a lot about my life and that of my family. Because I live in a nest of gifted souls.
I'm not bragging. It is a part of me the same as my hair and eye color. I don't always do with it what I should, but it is a part of me.
It is that intelligence which will allow me to see the forest for the trees and get through this year. It is that intelligence which will figure out a way for her to be happy so she leaves me alone. And it is that intelligence which will figure out a way to make this work for the kids.
Now, if I can use the intelligence to harness the pride, temper and ego - I will survive.
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3 comments:
Poeple like funsucker are not intelligent and very insecure. the only way they survive is by making others feel less important.
It took me years to realize this and now that I do, I cope witht he funscukers better (still hate them.)
good luck .
I just signed up for the AP Summer Institute in Calculus. Now I start relearning the calc I haven't used....
The district is ok with this as are the other math teachers.
Those institutes are great. Who's giving it? I know quite a few of the presenters.
They are long hours--I think the one I took went 9 - 4 four days and then 1/2 day on Friday.
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